Sad Cypress
by yunakitty
Summary: Inspired by an Agatha Christie novel. KainxCecil. A little glimpse into Kain's bittersweet love for his best friend.


"Hmmm?" Cecil stirred, moving his head in Kain's lap as he turned a page of his book. "Did you say something?"

"No," Kain replied. He looked away, gazing intently at one of the hybrid tea roses dotting the wall of the castle garden. He had actually murmured Cecil's name subconsciously, and he was too embarrassed to admit it.

"Oh," Cecil said, yawning. He laid the book aside and rolled so that he was facing up at Kain. "Are you hungry? Want to get some lunch?"

"I'm fine. We can wait a bit more." He wanted to stay out here with Cecil for as long as he could.

Cecil smiled up at him, squinting a bit in the bright sunlight. "Your hair is getting long," he commented, reaching up and playing with a strand of honey colored silk. "Are you really going to grow it to your waist?"

"If it'll get that long," Kain responded. He hesitated, then with one shaking hand he felt a bit of Cecil's wispy blond hair. "And you? How long are you going to let yours get?"

"Oh, not as long as you," Cecil said. He twirled a piece of it around his finger. "It's so messy and wavy. I don't think I could stand it if it got to my waist. Maybe just to my shoulders or mid back."

"Ah," Kain murmured. Cecil's hair was chin length now, and it suited him immensely. Kain's own locks grazed his shoulders. He usually wore them back in a ponytail, but today they didn't have lessons, so he was wearing it loose and casual.

He and Cecil were sixteen this year, and closer than any brothers could ever be. They had both been raised by the king of Baron, yet from an old enough age that they didn't think of each other as brothers in the familial sense. They knew that they weren't related... which was a huge relief to Kain, as he found himself overwhelmingly attracted to Cecil.

And Cecil was attracted to Kain... but Kain knew it wasn't to the same degree as his own passion. Cecil was clearly fond of Kain, and never refused his kisses, but Kain knew instinctively to hold back a bit. Cecil had once told him that his aloofness was his favorite trait of Kain's. "You're so calm and collected," Cecil had praised him. "I don't think I could stand being with someone who was unpredictable or excitable. I like that you're not clingy, either."

Kain had given a half smile and a shrug, but a dark cloud had gone over his heart. For he knew that the truth was, his heart was filled with stormy passion for Cecil. He wasn't calm and collected at all. Every time he caught a glimpse of Cecil, or heard even one word he said, his blood began pumping furiously and his head was reeling. He was madly, passionately in love with his best friend, but he didn't dare let on.

He felt lucky to have this much, and didn't want to scare Cecil off. No, that was the last thing he would ever do. That was why he let Cecil lead when they began to kiss or tentatively touch each other. He always wanted Cecil to feel in control. And he knew if he went with his own instincts, they would be naked and joined in the blink of an eye.

Kain looked down into his lap. Cecil had dozed off now, his chest rising and falling slowly. Kain liked when Cecil was asleep, because he could stare at him as much as he wanted to without alarming him. "Cecil," he found himself whispering again. He reached down and played with a soft curl behind Cecil's ear.

At least an hour passed. Kain's right leg fell asleep, and it felt extremely uncomfortable, but he wouldn't allow himself to even shift his body in the slightest, for fear of disturbing Cecil's slumber. Finally, Cecil murmured something and then yawned, stretching as he sat up.

"Whew! What a nice little nap!" he remarked cheerfully. "I'm starving now. Let's get some lunch, Kain."

Kain bowed his head in assent, and followed Cecil into the castle.

That night, Kain lay awake in bed. Some people prayed to God when they were in their beds - Kain prayed that Cecil would knock on his door. Every night he had the same prayer. _"Please, please let him come. Please..."_

He was just drifting off in disappointment when he heard soft rapping. He was awake in a second, and threw off the bedclothes to answer the knocking. He took a deep breath and composed himself, forcing a calm expression on his face before he opened the door.

Sure enough, Cecil was there, smiling a bit abashedly. "Can't sleep," he explained.

Kain just answered with a nonchalant shrug, backing up to allow his friend into the room. His heart was practically beating out of his chest, however. "Wanna play cards?" he offered, though he already knew the answer.

"Nah, we can just lay in bed... and... talk," Cecil replied.

They went through this charade every few nights. Cecil would supposedly suffer from insomnia, come looking for entertainment from his best friend, and they would end up under the covers together, kissing and touching in the darkness. The first time Cecil had come to Kain's room, he had actually been sleepless. But since then, for the last six months or so, it was simply teenage hormones that brought him there.

It was always Cecil that came to Kain. Of course Kain wanted more than anything to go to Cecil's bed when he had the urge. The problem was, he had the urge for Cecil day and night, every single second. So that would never do. He couldn't let on how badly he needed Cecil. So, he laid in bed every night and prayed this would be the night Cecil showed up.

Kain and Cecil were in the bed together now, lights off. Only the moonlight illuminated the room, and then only barely. Cecil supposedly wanted to to talk, but no words came from his lips. Instead, his lips were rapidly seeking out Kain's in the darkness. "Mmm," he hummed, as he found what he was looking for and kissed his friend.

Kain's eyes rolled back in his head, unseen by Cecil in the darkness. What heaven this was. To be kissed by Cecil, the love of his life. He managed to restrain himself though, limiting his actions to simple closed mouth kisses until Cecil took it to the next level, parting his lips and sliding his tongue out. Then and only then did he open his own mouth and begin kissing Cecil deeply.

Hands tangled in long blond hair, bodies pressed together under the sheets. Kain was already aroused - the second Cecil had knocked on the door, he had begun to get an erection in anticipation. He could feel that Cecil was excited too, his manhood rigid and hot, pressed against Kain's leg.

This was usually what they did. They rubbed against each other somewhat erratically until they both climaxed, rarely pausing their kissing. Every once in a while hands made it into play; sometimes on each other's members and sometimes on their own. The first time Cecil had fondled Kain's erection, Kain had succumbed immediately, releasing with a broken whimper. He had not expected it, and the sudden excitement had driven him over the edge.

As with everything else, Kain waited for Cecil's lead with these things. If Cecil touched him, then he would touch Cecil. If Cecil touched himself, then Kain would touch himself. And if Cecil just wanted simple body friction, Kain would stick with that. The most important thing was that he didn't let on how badly he wanted Cecil. He must never, ever do that.

On this night, Cecil's hand was straying downwards. Kain waited with bated breath to see which erection Cecil would grasp, and he moaned softly as Cecil selected Kain's. Kain's hand immediately flew below Cecil's waist, slipping inside his pajama pants and stroking the pleasantly warm cock he found there. It was always a bit awkward when they stroked each other face to face, as Kain was left handed, while Cecil was right handed. So when they faced each other, their stroking hands were on the same side. But they managed to work out a way to overlap their arms without impeding each other too much.

Their mouths met again, tongues battling. Cecil stroked Kain loosely and without much rhythm, but it didn't really matter. Kain felt like he could cum just by looking at Cecil sometimes. His own hand steadily pumped at Cecil, trying to give him the maximum amount of stimulation. For Kain disliked climaxing before Cecil did. He felt like he was somehow being selfish when he did that, and that irked him. To him, Cecil always came first, in every way.

Cecil broke his mouth out of the kiss, and pressed his forehead to Kain's shoulder. "Ohhh..." he moaned quietly, as he began to erupt. Kain stroked faster, sighing with happiness when he felt the hot stickiness covering his fingers. He thrust his hips into Cecil's now slack hand, grunting through gritted teeth as he climaxed.

They lay together in the afterglow, fingers absentmindedly trailing through the messes they had made. Then Cecil pulled away, grabbed some tissues, and they cleaned up in the dark. He chatted amiably about nothing in particular, clearly not still lost in the magic like Kain was. For Kain always felt entranced and pleasantly hypnotized after he had Cecil had a "session." Kain managed to breathe out appropriate responses to Cecil's words, but he was still in a lovely little daze.

"Well, see ya tomorrow," Cecil said casually. He tossed the used tissues in the trash, and hopped off the bed, then exited the room. Kain watched him go, wishing with all his might that Cecil would give him a goodbye kiss. Or maybe even stay the night for once.

But he knew in his heart that for Cecil, that's not what this was about. It was easy sexual relief with someone he could trust. He knew Cecil wasn't in love with him. And that hurt him deeply. But at the same time, it didn't diminish his love for his friend. No, he was resigned to be whatever Cecil needed him to be. A lover in this moment, just a friend in the next, a brother tomorrow. He would never demand anything else of Cecil.

All that mattered was that Cecil was happy with their relationship. It didn't matter how Kain felt. Even if he felt at times as if he had a huge, gaping hole in his heart from the lack of returned love; that had to be stifled down. Those agonizing, painful feelings were worth it, in exchange for the moments of bliss he shared with Cecil at other times.

And maybe... just maybe... Cecil would come to love him back in the same way. One day...


End file.
